Wednesday, November 5, 2014

Three plus years in NYC

So with the passing of this summer I have lived in New York city for three years and a few months, actually moved to Williamsburg, Brooklyn on July 4th 2011.  I thought now would be a good time to tally things up so far:
-have lived in two different apartments in Brooklyn. The first one was in Williamsburg with Scott who was a gay airline steward alcoholic. The second in DUMBO with a list of people to long to go through but suffice it to say Joe and Dan have been the two constant roommates.
-have worked three jobs. The first one was at Languagemate as a junior system admin later becoming the only IT guy. Then I went and joined Charles, who I worked with at Languagemate, at Ogilvy and Mather which turned out to be a bad move because I got laid off after six months. For the last year plus I have been working as a system administrator for the New York Genome Center.
-dated two girls; first one worked with Scott and when things went crazy with him shit went crazy with her too. She disappeared for a few months and then turned back up for about two weeks and then went bonkers (see my 'I don't understand women' post). The second one I met at The Vanderbilt in Park Slope and I really thought and hoped it was going to be a long term relationship but she dumped me after about two months.
-zero New York friends. So I've met people but have not been able to really connect with or find a group of people that I fit in with.
The last two points have been a real problem for me and I don't know what to do about them. I thought that with the diversity of people in New York City that there would be some individuals or groups that I would identify with and could form friendships with but sadly I haven't been able to make/find those connections.

Tuesday, November 4, 2014

Election Day

So Tuesday November 4th and it is election day here in the United States of America. I have to look up why November 4th became election day, I personally think it is should be April 15th. Now I know your thinking but April 15th is when people have to pay their taxes they can't be thinking about elections then. I whole heartedly disagree and think that is the perfect time for people to be thinking about who is representing them in government. Just think about it like this, it is the time your actually seeing how much money you personally have given to the government and in some cases how much more they want from you. I also feel it would increase participation in the election process and it would be as simple as mailing in your ballot with your taxes. I know your now thinking well that would mean it wouldn't be a secret ballot and that people would know who I voted for. You know what the whole secret ballot thing is for another time and place. Secret ballots were done in times and places where one could be killed or kicked out of a community if they voted for the losing party and in today's America that is just not going to happen. Fine if you really care about a secret ballot then when you mail in your taxes the election form could be in a smaller sealed envelope marked only with the words BALLOT on the outside and the only thing the IRS and State Revenue offices do is collect them and pass them along to election boards. Oh and if your filling as a couple you get two ballot envelopes and the agencies just confirm that you are a couple before passing the envelopes on. See how simple that is. So instead of the low turnout we see for elections and the even lower turnout we see for midterm elections I see this as a way of increasing participation in the system and actually getting the people involved in the system at the very basic level.

Sunday, November 2, 2014

Rough month October

The first few days of October were great because for the last two months I was seeing this amazing woman. I had met her on July 23rd at a bar/restaurant in the Park Slope neighborhood of Brooklyn called The Vanderbilt. I was checking bars off of the New York Good Beer Passport and had just come from Glorietta Baldy, my plan was on just having one at The Vanderbilt and then going back to my apartment. It was a quite Wednesday night and I had no trouble finding a spot at the bar. A quick look at the beer list and I decide on a new brewery from the Gowanus neighborhood Other Half Pale Ale, a friend had told me to keep an eye open for their stuff. As I settled in with my pint I noticed that there were four or five little origami dollar bills by the tap handles with one being really good and the others not so great. While I was playing with the origami a woman sat down to my right and she noticed the origami and a conversation started. Well after two or more drinks and some great conversation it was time for the woman to leave so she asked for the check and went to use the ladies room. I sat there thinking what I great time I just had and decide that when the woman came back I would ask for her number and give her mine. When she came back she settled her bill and as she was saying good night I asked her for her number and to my surprise she was applicable and we exchanged numbers. I settled up and rode back to my apartment very happy. I called her the very next day but got her voicemail so left her a message saying how much I enjoyed talking with her the other night and how I would like to see her again. The next day I got a text from her apologizing for missing my call it was due to a dead battery. I responded with a quick 'understand' then asked if it was good to talk at noon and she respond that she was free to talk then. I wanted to see her again as soon as possible so at noon I found a quite place in the office to talk and gave her a call. Told her again how nice it was to have met her and how much I enjoyed talking with her and she said the feeling was mutual. I suggested going to a music festival that was happening that weekend in Brooklyn called the Psychobilly Luau the only reason I wanted to go was because the Turbo A.C.'s were playing. She was interested but wasn't sure she was free and said she would get back to me. It turned out she wasn't free but we agreed to try to work something out for next week. I later saw that the upcoming Friday Mucca Pazza was playing at the Brooklyn Bowl and when we spoke later suggested it and that worked for her. We planned on talking again Thursday to workout times, where to meet, where to eat before the show and all that other stuff. I called her at lunch time on Thursday and we decide to meet at a new place by her apartment called Bar Chuko at eight on Friday. I got to the restaurant about forty minutes early and walked around the block twice before sitting down outside the restaurant for fifteen minutes. She showed up pretty much right on time and looked great. However one thing that became very apparent that was not noticed at The Vanderbilt was the height difference me being a tall and lanky 6'5" where she was a cute and petite 5'6" maybe. Once we sat down for dinner though it was not a problem because we were face-to-face and the great conversation just started. I told her about Mucca Pazza and she told me about a band that she was part of from time to time called Polyphonic Spree. My first thought was a woman who understands music, great! It was also discussed about how she was transitioning out of a job that she had been at for six years and that she was leaving because of management changes. Now having been through similar situations at VMware and then later Interwoven I could certainly relate my experiences to her. Still it made me a bit uneasy that she would be in a transition period. Anyway we had a great dinner and got over to the Brooklyn Bowl to catch about three or four songs of the opening act. During the intermission we decide we should make a restroom run. I was in and out of the restroom like is typical for guys and was waiting for her down the hallway. When she came out of the ladies room she called me down the hallway to point out a poster for a upcoming Polyphonic Spree show. She told me that they had contacted her about it but that she was going to be visiting with family in Colorado. The show was a typical Mucca Pazza experience which she enjoyed. After the show we decide to not fight for a cab and get a drink so I suggested the Gibson which was just up the street. We had one drink at the Gibson and then headed back to Park Slope. Since it was still early we decide to have one last stop at where we first met The Vanderbilt. After we walked backed to her apartment and as goodnights were being said she initiated the kiss to which I gladly responded. From that point until October 3rd I thought everything was great. Even though I was thinking about her pretty much all the time I wanted to take things slow so I was not calling, emailing or texting her all the time didn't want to become annoying. She did a trip to visit her grandmother who was celebrating a 98 birthday and then she was off to Colorado, she was gone for about ten days. She also did a trip to Burning Man for a few days and I went to Chicago. Neither of us were being clingy but we certainly were enjoying each others company when we were together. So when on Friday October 3rd my sister and husband were up for a visit I thought to introduce her to them so I suggested it to her and she said yes. I met her at her apartment a good hour before we planned on meeting my sister and her husband. We decide to stop at a small speakeasy sort of place around the corner to have a drink in the backyard. Once we had our drinks and found seats in the backyard that's when my month became shit. She was honest but could not explain other then whatever "chemistry" there was she no longer felt it. She talked about how great of a guy she thought I was and how she hoped we could be friends but I was just sort of numb and blindsided. I could tell it was rough on her so I just pretty much nodded and agreed still not believing that I had found such an amazing person and now she wasn't going to be in my life anymore. Needless to say she did not join me when I met my sister and her husband later instead I walked her back to her place and we said good-bye. I haven't been depressed but I've just been feeling a great sadness for the past month, it might not help that I'm listening to a lot of Johnny Cash. The thing that really sucks is for the previous months when I thought of her it would always brighten up my day but now those thoughts make me sad. I've been riding my bike and been repeating the same thing over and over in my head 'STOP THINKING ABOUT HER!STOP THINKING ABOUT HER!STOP THINKING ABOUT HER!STOP THINKING ABOUT HER!STOP THINKING ABOUT HER!.....' with the occasional 'SHE'S FORGOTTEN ABOUT YOU!' and/or 'YOU WILL NEVER SEE HERE AGAIN!' so 'STOP THINKING ABOUT HER!STOP THINKING ABOUT HER!STOP THINKING ABOUT HER!STOP THINKING ABOUT HER!...' but it hasn't helped. I'm just pathetic. The thing is I don't understand why I can't find someone who can stay with me longer then six months. I like to think I'm a caring, compassionate and good person but there must be something else that the women in my life are seeing that makes them want to stop being with me after a few months. Anyway it has been a rough month.